Divine Will 

Our Lord Jesus Christ has come to set us free and bring us back to all that He is in Himself. To bring us back into the bosom of our Father. We are destined by God to be heirs in the Kingdom prepared for us since the foundation of the world. I have to witness to all that He has done in my life so that others will believe and come to live fully in Him.  This is the reason God created us.  This is truly to call us back to return to the order, to our place and to our purpose for which we were created by God. Sin clouds the souls mind so that it cannot see clearly Gods designs for us.

 

Here is my story:

 

When my father was in the first grade he was stricken by spinal meningitis and went unconscious. He lived that year in the hospital. He missed his whole first grade of school.   The doctors finally experimented with Penicillin on my dad and it worked and God spared the life of my father.  His grandmother always felt that since God spared my dad’s life that he should be a priest.  Well, he entered the seminary but this vocation was not for him.  He ended up going to West Point and marrying my mom.  On May 5, 1969, my parents had twins at the Sacred Heart Hospital in Yankton, SD.  I am the oldest one by 5 minutes and was born upside down just like Luisa Piccarretta.  In her autobiography it stated that Luisa said, “I was born backwards, so my life should be the opposite of the lives of the rest of creatures!” Nothing in life is by chance but by God incidents.  My twin sister and I shared a room with twin beds.  I would always have scary dreams and then end up in bed with my twin sister.  I was so scared all the time at night and especially of the dark. I am still scared of the dark.  I am also shy.  Yes, there is a reason for that too.  God tells Luisa that the reason he made her shy was because he was jealous of her love and wanted her love all to Himself. We were always taught before we went to bed to kneel by our bed to say our prayers.  Since my father was in the military; I always prayed for world peace every night.

 

At the age of seven it was time for Heidi and I to make our First Holy Communion.  As I went up to receive I choked on the Eucharist and I quick swallowed Him because I did not want him on the floor.  After this incident, I did not receive Him for a very long time out of fear of choking again.  When I would spend some time with my grandparents in the summer time in Wisconsin my grandmother would always go before me and have the EM break it into a little piece for me. When I would go back home, I would not receive at all. During the summers in Wisconsin my grandmother would take Heidi and I every Tuesday to the Heritage nursing home.  We would help my grandmother bring everyone into the community center in the nursing home and the priest would come and say Mass and my grandmother’s friend would play the organ for the Mass and we would have cookies and juice following for everyone.  My grandmother was truly a good example for us all.

 

When I was in High School, I was sick.  I had an eating problem where I would never eat.  I was never hungry.  Every time I would eat I would throw up. This happened for about a year and a half. My weight was 93lbs.  My boyfriend ended up telling my mother and she took me to the doctor and he told us that if I did not gain three pounds in the next week that he was putting me in the Hospital.  After this incident I begged God to heal me. I was so out of control with my body that I realized the only thing that was going to help me was God.  My prayer was indeed answered and everything  just left me. Just like that.    

 

It was my junior year at NAU in Flagstaff, Arizona that something happened to me that I cannot explain to the fullest because you would be the one to have to have this experience. I was at the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass and I saw my ex-boyfriend with another girl and I literally started balling at this Mass.  I could not control myself.  We had just broken up not too long before this incident and I had been with him off and on for six years. So, you can see this for very hard for me to see. It was time to receive Holy Communion and this time a force literally pulled me up and before I knew it I was in line to receive Holy Communion. I asked myself what in the world am I doing.  But I received Him and did not choke.  I was elated.  The first thing I did after Mass was that I went back to my dorm room and called my grandmother.  She was elated too.  She was a very religious woman who knew that Jesus was truly present in the Eucharist.  On that day I felt like I was receiving Jesus for the very first time.

 

It was the summer of 1991 is when I completed my junior year in college and had to go on an externship for dental hygiene school.  I was on the books to go to an Indian reservation in Tuba City when my friend Valerie Long goes, “No you are not going there.  You are going with me to Gallup, New Mexico and I have a place where we can stay.  So we asked our teacher if this was possible and she called the clinic and they said ok.  So, I ended up going to Gallup, New Mexico for my externship that summer. You are never going to guess what happened there? The first day I got to the clinic I noticed this young dentist who normally works in Tohatchi, New Mexico.  He was asked to work at that dental clinic in Gallup, New Mexico because they really needed help.  He really took to me under his wings and he let me give dental injections to all his patients that day.    Then that evening he invited Valerie and I to his apartment for dinner.  He really is a good cook. That evening I looked into his eyes and a voice came out from nowhere saying to me, “This is the man you are going to marry.” We dated and he took me to Santa Fe for the weekends to show me around the area.  Just beautiful. Then we said goodbye after three weeks.  But, as fate would have it,  he would continue to call me and come to visit to see me on the weekends in Phoenix during that summer. We dating and at the end of my senior year in college he called me  and told me that he was be transferred to Phoenix for an advanced general practice residency at the Phoenix Indian Medical center in Phoenix.  To make a long story short, we ended up getting married on April 24, 1993 at St Mary’s Basilica in Phoenix. 

 

In January of 1997, I was in training to bring communion to the sick and our trainer asked us to close our eyes and meditate.  Well, I saw Jesus, A huge Cross, and the most magnificent tabernacle. I opened my eyes and got scared.  The teacher asked us what we saw and I did not want everyone to know so I told her what happened at the very end of class and she told me if I ever mediated before and I told her no. She told me that I received a gift from God and to go with it. Then other things started happening to me.  I started going to daily Mass and someone handed me a booklet on divine mercy.  So I read it all the way through and did what it said to do. I went to this priest and he asked me why had  been so long since I went to confession.  I could not answer him. I realized Gods grace it what got me there and to feel forgiven by God in the Sacrament of confession is the most wonderful experience you could ever have. I remember going in my car and just balling after that confession. I had been in a state of serious sin.

 

In June of 1997, I received in the mail a letter from a friend of mine who told me that she was mediating on the Our Father and these writings came to her and she wanted to share them with me. So, I ordered some tapes and books and looked into Luisa’s Writings.  In July 1997 at 3:00 in the morning I had another vision of Jesus with white bold letters upon his chest that read COVENANT. I then ran to search for my bible.  My husband goes what is going on with you?  I told him what happened and he told me that Covenant means promise.  Then I made the connection that this was the promise of the Our Father in Luisa’s Writings. So one thing led to another and here we are.

 

Luisa Piccarreta was a privileged soul.  She was bedridden for 64 years.  She lived solely on the Eucharist. Jesus came to her and revealed to her how to live in the Divine Will. Now she is teaching it to us.  She wrote it all down in 36 volumes. Jesus asked her what a host is.  He stated, “A host is nothing other than My Life in it and I want My Life to be hidden in you. He wants us to share in His Risen Humanity so that we can become his daughter and sons and to be what God created us to be.  Kings and Queens in the Kingdom of Heaven. So that we can be all that He is in Himself. He wants to Reign in Us.  This is the Eucharistic Reign of Jesus and His call to Holiness.   Sometimes our downfall can be used for God’s Glory.  My downfall was the Eucharist.  God is calling us now to become living hosts pleasing to Jesus. After beginning to read the writings I went to this conference in August 2000 in Carlsbad, California and they brought out the lives and writings of the saints.  My particular interest was St Faustina.  Because God lead me so profoundly from St. Faustina to Luisa in three months time.  For this indeed is the hour of Mercy. St Faustina used to pray to become a living host pleasing to Him all the time. And the Lord answered her saying, "since you have done my will in all things you now are a living host pleasing to me." (Diary 1826). After this conference I knew in my Heart that all of this was from God. I was on my way home from confession on a Saturday and it was on labor day weekend;  a 2000 Dodge truck  ran a red light and he hit me. Everything happened so fast. I was in a Honda at the time and it kept on spinning round and round and It nearly hit the light pole.  I know my guardian angels were protecting me big time that day.  A paramedic was on the scene of the accident and he came running over to me and told me that my car might explode and that I needed to get out of it immediately. So, he took me out of my car and examined me.  He told me that I was going to be ok that I just needed medical attention. I got a big laceration on my head and I need staples to be placed there.  Blood was all over my head and shirt.  I had bruises up and down my body. The truck driver was driving on a suspended license from California and was driving his mother’s brand new truck.  He was fine but his truck and my car were totally demolished. All I could do was sit there and make reparation for this man’s void acts and sins and I sealed him in the blood of the lamb and I offered him up to God for His Glory.  He came and apologized to me and the cop was so mad at him he ticketed him five times.  He got five tickets. I was in a state of shock for the awhile afterwards and took a week off of work. I felt like I was in combat.

 

“My daughter, the crowning of Thorns contains many meanings. Despite however much is said, there still remains more to be said. The fact that my Head wanted to be honored by having its own distinct and special, not general, portion of suffering and the shedding of Blood, almost in competition with my Body, is something almost incomprehensible to the created mind.  The reason is that it’s head is nothing. Although it’s possible to live without other members of the body, it’s impossible to live without the head since it is the essential part of the entire man; so much so, that if the body sins or does good, it’s the head that’s doing the directing and the rest of the body is nothing more than an instrument. My Head had to restore my rule and my lordship, to obtain the merit so that the new heavens of Grace and the new worlds of Truth might enter human minds, and to fight back new hells of sin and vile passions.  Since I want to crown the entire human family with glory, honor and dignity, I wanted first, there, to crown and honor My Humanity, though with a painful crown of thorns, which is a symbol of the crown of immortality that I restored to creatures which had been lost on account of sin. Besides that, the Crowning with Thorns means that there is no glory and honor without thorns.  The passions can never be controlled, nor can the virtue be acquired without the piercing of both flesh and spirit.  True power lies in the giving of self, with the wounds of mortification and of sacrifice.  Finally, the crown of thorns means that I am the one true King, and that whoever makes Me, alone, King of their heart will enjoy peace and happiness; and I will make such a person Queen of my Kingdom.  So, all those streams of Blood that flowed down from my Head flooded human minds with knowledge of my Kingship over them.” October 12, 1903, Words from Jesus Christ to Luisa.

 

Heaven is a state and it can be lived here in now.  The more you show mercy to others the more God will show you mercy.  This is how it works. “The Kingdom of God is the manifestation and the realization of God’s plan of salvation in all it’s fullness.” (Redemptoris Missio, pg. 27)  “Those who feed on Christ in the Eucharist need not wait until the hereafter to receive eternal life: they already possess it on earth, as the first-fruits of a future fullness which will embrace man in his totality (Ecclesia de Eucharistia, pg.25).